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Saturday, November 29, 2008 - 11:24 AM
nakakahiya na
iiyak habang nagcocomputer.
habang kumakain sa chowking.
habang nagtratrabaho.
habang nasa fx.
habang mag-isa.
ang hirap. sobra.
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Sunday, November 23, 2008
- 12:30 PM
you're terminal
'i think you're OK.'
sabi ng kano sakin habang naglalakad kami palabas. 'what do you mean ok?'
'i mean you're OK to go. you're on terminal leave.'
terminal leave? anong sinasabi nito? nakatingin ako sa exit ng office, nalulunkot at naiinis kung bakit bigla akong tatanggalin. maganda naman stats ko. everything looks quite good at work. kailangan kong malaman kung ano'ng nagyayari.
'excuse me, sir. but why am i suddenly put on terminal leave?'
'you have terminal cancer.'
then boom. all of me shut down. he went on explaining something about bones and oxygen and how soon i am going to die. but i was there, tulala. a lot of other things happened at the same time. ang bilis ng takbo ng utak ko. nirarationalize ko agad kung bakit mamamatay na ko. at some point dumating yung inaaccept ko na yung fact na i'm gonna die pretty soon. tas naisip ko siya. kung pano ko sasabihin sa kanya. tas sunod-sunod pumasok sa isip ko yung mga plano namin na hindi na matutuloy. naisip ko din mga taong malapit sakin. masakit pala.
di ko pa kaya. ayoko pang mamatay. ayokong mamatay ng maaga. umiyak ako.
nagising ako ng umiiyak.
pota. buti nalang panaginip.
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Saturday, November 01, 2008
- 10:05 PM
drivin
yeah. kanina i went driving. with my dad.
pft. boring, lemme tell you that. we went running around the village for i don't know how long before we went out to the main road. di man lang ako umabot sa cainta.
but i guess that's how it really starts, your father worried as hell, thinking that you'd crash into a tree or run over a stray chicken. i didn't. yet. lol.
heniway, i'll go driving again tomorrow. i hope. and maybe i'll reach antipolo. but i ain't getting my hopes high. :)
enjoy the rest of your weekend. ΓΌ
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